I want adventure in the great wide somewhere...

I am ready for an adventure. Seriously...I am ready to go somewhere new and I am ready for something to happen. The past week has been rough. Unmet desires flaring up...laying those same unmet desires at Jesus' feet...same unmet desires flaring up again...over and over again for over a week. Add in some heaviness due to the condition of the world, and so many other things and that is how I'm feeling.

I am so frustrated over the way guys and girls treat each other. Why can't we all just respect one another? I know I don't treat the men in my life like I should...I'm working on it, but at the same time women aren't treated the way they should be either.

I am broken over the condition of the world. It seems like no matter where I'm at, work, class, walking on campus, everywhere I see people looking for fulfillment in places that will not fulfill them. And I cry for them. I cry because children have to grow up in this world where everything is so messed up. I cry because so many of my peers don't know any better. I cry because I do so very little to make a difference.

I am frustrated right now because God has brought some amazing men into my life who are going to make awesome husbands and fathers, and none of them are for me (or if they are just not right now). I'm frustrated because He keeps showing me these amazing men and then tells me to wait. I'm frustrated because my heart wants what it does not have. I'm frustrated with myself that I cannot be content right now.

I'm frustrated because I finished reading a book about how guys want so much more than sexy, in which the author goes through four things that are "male repellents" none of which I have, and still I don't even have anyone who is interested in me.

And I hate that I have all these frustrations. I trust God. I trust His timing. I trust that He has a plan for my life that is better than any I can ever come up with. And I lay myself at His feet on a daily basis, surrendering my will to His, and yet all of this comes up over and over again.

This is one of those days when I want to get in my car and drive far away and keep going until I have to stop and earn some money to just keep going.

Yeah, in short, I'm kind of a mess right now.

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