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Showing posts from October, 2011

let my eyes see beauty

Okay, so my last post alluded to something that had really been hitting me lately. That something is the ability to see loveliness when all appearances are unlovely. This is a theme in some of my favorite movies -- Beauty and the Beast for one. The whole premise of the movie is that the Beast has to find someone who will think that he is worth loving with his beastly appearance intact. The sweetest scene of the movie is when they dress up for dinner, and the Beast is showing Belle what a gentleman he can be, and they end up dancing in a large ballroom. They are dancing, and even though Belle hasn't told him that she loves him, the way she looks at him tells the whole story. She gazes at him with such loving adoration in her eyes that you can tell she is really seeing him, not just seeing the beastly appearance, but seeing who he really is. She sees loveliness where there appears to be nothing lovely at all. I have been to see the new Footloose movie twice already (don't judge

a real life fairy tale

This is something I wrote a couple of years ago, but lately there is a theme that has been recurring in my life and this story again seemed to fit it. I'll have another post about this theme, but I just wanted to post this for now. Once upon a time there was a ordinary young woman. She wasn't really anything remarkable. In fact, she wasn't really anything to look at, she didn't have any amazing talents, and she lived on the streets. Her clothes were filthy, and her feeling of hunger was constant, not just a hunger for food, but for love and a better life. In short, she was filthy, and she often wondered if anyone really cared or would look past all of her filth to see the person beneath it. One day, her hunger was so great, that she gave in and stole some food. As she ate it, it practically stuck in her throat as her conscience pricked her for stealing, but she ate it anyway, and gradually she became accustomed to stealing to eat. She lived a life of fear, alw

o my soul, faint not

The last few warm days of summer seem to be gone, and I am struck by the suddenness of fall. It seems to have snuck up on me and taken me by surprise. I often feel this way about Spring. After enduring the cold months of winter it seems that I wake up one morning to find the trees abloom and tulips popping up everywhere. There is only one problem with this. I want to be aware. I want to see the seasons change, to celebrate each one. I want to soak in the goodness and faithfulness of God to bring each season. I want to see the signs that the seasons are changing. I want to welcome each season (even if it isn't my favorite) with open arms and a willingness to Trust God in each season. So even though I seem to be a couple of weeks late. . .welcome Fall. Welcome season of quietness and reflection and introspection. Welcome shorter days and longer nights. Welcome season of resting and celebrating. May I soak in God's goodness in this season. May I be ever mindful of God's faithf

a quiet yes

I have always desired to live my life without letting fear control me. Sometimes I find this the hardest thing to do when facing the great unknown of the future. My life is so drastically different at this time of my life than I ever imagined that it would be. God's plan for my life is so incredibly different than mine was. So I have been saying a quiet yes in my heart and soul lately to the things of God and leaving behind the things of myself. I would love to say that every time I say yes to Him the next time is easier, but it isn't. No matter how many times I die to myself it is still dying to myself every time. But when it comes right down to it, I want God's plan and not mine because I have no good apart from Him. Awake My Soul - Mumford & Sons

thoughts lately

There are three main thoughts that have entered my mind in the last couple of days that probably speak the most about what is going on in my heart lately. The first was from praise and worship last night. The worship leader was telling us about how important it is to remember to have times of silence in our time with God. This reminded me of a passage out of 1 Kings which I then looked up and read. "And he said, "Go out and stand on the mount before the LORD." And behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind tore the mountains and broke in pieces the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. And after the wind an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. And after the earthquake a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire the sound of sheer silence. And when Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his cloak and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave." - 1 Kings 19:11-13 What I realized about this passa

something I love

I love when God takes us at our word. Like when you tell Him that you want to go to the next level of maturity with Him, and He takes you there (albeit through challenges, frustrations, and possibly tears). Or like when you tell Him that you want to be more committed to spending time with Him in the morning, and He wakes you up early just to spend time with Him. Or like when you tell Him that you want Him to remove everything from you that is not of Him, and He does. I love when He calls my bluff and actually goes directly to the deep part of my heart where I do want all those things. I love that He is God and that He has yada knowledge of me. And I love that I will someday have yada knowledge of Him.

oh the travel bug

The travel bug has been biting me a lot lately. Sometimes when I take a short roadtrip somewhere I get the desire to just keep driving and see where I end up. Lately, it has been more of a desire to go to the airport, get on the first plane leaving and step off somewhere where they speak a different language and have a completely different culture. The impulsive side of me says "Pack your bag!" Then the logical side of me takes over and reigns me in. The logical side reminds me that I need to be responsible and that I have school and work. It reminds me that I want to have complete financial stability. It reminds me that I will be taking a roadtrip in November to visit my lovely sister and brother. It reminds me that I just have to wait a little while and then I will be able to do those things I want to do. In the meantime. . .does anyone have some travel bug repellent??