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Showing posts from February, 2011

but then I go on again

Sometimes the days just string together and unless you pay attention, you end up somewhere you never expected to be. Sometimes the people around you have to give you a reality check. Sometimes God just pulls you up short and asks you hard questions. My days have strung together. Somewhere in the monotony of life and work I stopped paying attention to where I was at and just kept going. I didn't realize how sad I was until my boss called me into his office and asked if everything was alright. I have cried a lot lately. I cried every day for a week and I have been on the verge of tears for quite a while. Tears are a blessing to me. For a long time I had none. Not that I didn't have a reason to cry, but I just wouldn't let myself. I had to prove that I was tough enough. Tears to me are evidence of the tenderness of my heart, and I am amazed at the work God has done in me. I am alright. I'm just a little sad right now. It took some soul searching after my chat with my boss

a day well spent

I am feeling kind of reflective after this (sort of) long day. It was just a day that I wasn't really expecting. I had several things that I wanted to make sure got done today that haven't happened or didn't happen the way I wanted them to. But at the end of it I come to this. I lived this day with intention. I know that because I prayed that before I started this day. My quiet time this morning was a lot of prayer. I spent time thanking God for this day, praising Him for who He is, and asking that this day would go according to His plan, and I know that it did. I prayed that I would be intentional in all that I did. I prayed that He would bring the people into my life who needed to be there. That is a powerful thing to ask. It means that as I was looking back over this day, I know that all of the people who I interacted with were intentionally put in my path today. Some of them I know why. There were good friends who I finally was able to hang out with. There were people w

sunday ponderings

I realize that I have kind of been slacking about blogging lately. Sorry 'bout that. I've been a little busy, and the weather has been so gorgeous this last week that I have been taking advantage of it to be outside as much as possible. I am a little nervous that winter will return with a vengeance, but for now I am simply enjoying the loveliness that is here (and maybe praying that it will stay for a good long while). One of my very dear friends left on Friday. It was a little difficult for me. I greatly dislike good-byes. She is moving halfway across the country. I know as difficult as it is for me and the other friends left here, it is much more difficult for our friend who is moving. I am very excited to go visit her, though. . .maybe in July sometime. . .we shall see. It's so crazy to think that in July I will be in massage therapy school. I am so excited to get started and start learning more about massage. I am eager for the opportunity to expand my skills and to be

change the world (II)

Some more thoughts. . .to go with my note change the world. Part of what has been causing me to ponder this lately is that in a far away country there has been an incredible change. For weeks my roommate and I would watch the drama unfold on the news. What started as a small group of young people insisting that their government listen to them became a group of hundreds of thousands of people camping out and protesting, demanding that they be given their rights. They succeeded. Their ruler stepped down, and they will be given a chance to form the government that they want. As I thought about that, I was awed at the change that was happening. In such a short time period, the world changed so dramatically. The world gets so excited when we see these big changes. We can see the change, and we are awed. But my next thought was what about the little changes, what about the ones that we don't see? Aren't those changes just as important as the big ones? What about the man who just take

a valentine's day story

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Just for your enjoyment on this Valentine's Day, I thought I would tell you a little story that caused me to smile and giggle to myself this past weekend. Saturday my roommate and I were returning a couple of things to Macy's (or rather my roommate was, and I was along for the trip). So the up escalator and the down escalator are right next to each other so that they make a X if you were to look at it from the side. We were going up, and talking about traveling or some such thing, and just as we got to the point where the up and down escalator intersect, I see something white fluttering out of the corner of my eye.I look down and see this laying next to my shoe on the escalator. I pick it up and realize that someone on the down escalator must have dropped it. I unfold it to see what it is, maybe thinking it will give some clue as to whether I should try to find the person and return it if this is something important. Mind you, my roommate and I are still continuing our conversa

change the world

*Fair Warning: I have been on the verge of tears for the last couple of days, so this might be an emotional blog post. Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead Last night I experienced this. I have been blessed to be surrounded with an incredible group of women who love God and are committed to following after His will and His heart. For the first time in about a year and a half, we got to spend an entire evening together catching up and soaking up quality time with each other. We all tried not to think of the circumstances surrounding why we were all getting together. One of these dear ladies is leaving. She is doing what she is supposed to do. She is following after God's heart and leading which is sadly leading her away from this place. We got together to celebrate our friend, to connect with each other one more time before we say good-bye. It is so difficult to think that in

freedom

I never really realized how much I depend on my computer to give me freedom. . .not until I was without it. I get on my computer a hundred times a day to look things up, to look at recipes, to check on all kinds of different things. It is a very specific type of freedom that I didn't realize I depended on as heavily as I do. I have gone through periods where I didn't get on my computer for days because of travel or personal choice or desire to disconnect from being so connected (one of the reasons I really don't want a smart phone is that you are always available). However, it is a little different when it is a forced separation. Anyway. . . My dear mum kindly offered to allow me to borrow her computer for the time being and then sent it to me next day by UPS, so I was only without a computer for the weekend. What an incredible blessing!! I mentioned in my last post that I am studying Ruth again. This is one of my favorite books in the Bible. It is so in-depth and yet if yo

news and thoughts

Well, my friends, my computer has died. :( Yes, I am in mourning. With the snow and my car being in a snow drift (until yesterday when I shoveled it out), not having a computer has been a touch difficult. However, I am surviving, and it is good because I am getting other things done that I want to accomplish. Although, my book pile hasn't shrunk yet. hmmm. . .well, my dear roommate and I are having a bit of a Jane Austen day and reading in the living room for the afternoon. Perhaps there will be a turn about the room later. I am reading Ruth again. It has been about three years since I studied it in depth, so this is good. I am having new thoughts and being reminded of old ones. I'm not quite sure why God is having me read Ruth again, but I know He has purpose in all things. I am probably going to begin reading a favorite book that goes along with Ruth again as well. Lady in Waiting by Jackie Kendall and Debbie Jones. Always incredibly challenging and thought provoking. My room

thoughts on stewardship

I have had many thoughts about stewardship rolling around in my head as of late (and by that I mean for about 6 months). When I start pondering about something, it seems to take a long time for me to think it out. I guess what started me on this topic was my church and pastor. My pastor gave a series of sermons on what our church stands for and the vision that our church has. Much of this is because the aim of the pastor and the elders is that we would have a church focused on quality rather than quantity. They want our church to be healthy from the roots, and not just outgrowing those roots. All of that to say that one of the things that kept coming up in these sermons was a need for good stewardship. All that we have we posses because God has given it to us. Our houses, our cars, our finances, our gifts, our abilities, our talents. . .everything that we have has been given to us by God. I think this has become especially apparent to me since I began living on my own after I graduated

with love

Dear Snow Day, What a lovely day you are! A day to stay inside all day. A day to wear pj's all day. A day to bake and cook warm comfort foods. A day to watch movies curled up on the sofa. A day to see the snow swirl off the roof as the wind catches it. A day for a White Collar marathon. A day for sleeping in under warm, comfy blankets. A day for many cups of hot tea. A day for ignoring the phone and the world. A day for not going to work. Thank you! Love, Meli