Something Beautiful

Today's title comes from an Owl City song...can't remember which one and don't have time to look it up right now because I only have 6 minutes in which to finish this blog post...nothing to speed up my writing like a deadline... Yep...made it to LA safe and sound. It was a day of firsts, and today will be as well. First time to come to LA (sort of). I was here when I was little, but I don't remember much of it. First time to check into a hotel by myself. First time to sleep in a hotel room by myself. First time to leave the country by myself. First time to wander around LA by myself. First time to fly over the Pacific Ocean. First time to visit New Zealand. I decided yesterday that whenever we do something that we have never done before it has to change us. Because we can never go back to being that person we were before. There has been lots of time to think and process life and talk to God and I'm looking forward to a lot more of that as well. Gotta run... Look up

Today's the day...I will be starting my great adventure. I realized yesterday that this will be my first time traveling out of the country without being with a group. This revelation caused a thrill of excitement as well as fear in equal proportions to course through my being. Part of me is glad and excited for this chance to travel on my own. The other part of me is excited that after traveling for 2-3 days I will be meeting up with some good friends and will have a travel companion. Excitement, fear, and above all peace are the feelings of my heart right now. The list of things to do before leaving is gradually dwindling and soon will not matter. Trying to remember all the last minute things I need to pack and take with me is more important now. passport - check ticket - check camera - check backpack - check adventuring spirit - double check I think I'm ready!! Well...after I finish the last ten things that I need to do...speaking of which I should get to them... A lovely tun

Okay so more specifically this is a lesson I learned from weed pulling. When you don't take care of a little problem it becomes a big problem very quickly. Then instead of a little time spent every so often working on a problem, you must spend intensive time repairing the damage done because of the problem. I was thinking specifically about sin in our lives. We let that one little sin go because we don't think it's a big deal. But before you know it, that one little sin has overwhelmed the flowerbed of your life and is choking out and killing off the beautiful flowers that were there. Yeah, you can spend a lot of time and energy and effort to remove it, but wouldn't it just be a little easier to tend carefully to the garden of your heart and deal with the little problems as they come instead of ignoring them or letting them go just this once? Trust me, this is a lesson I need just as much as anyone else. That's probably why God had me pulling weeds this afternoon. O

The world is a book, and those who do not travel read only one page. ~ St. Augustine You've heard of the seven-year itch in marriages. Where after seven years the husband and wife get tired of being married and want a change. Well, I suffer from the two-year itch as I call it. About every two years I start feeling edgy. I would swear that somewhere in my heritage there is gypsy blood. I almost always feel the need to travel. After about three years of constant travel and 1,000,000 miles my parents were finally able to settle down for 6 months...and I have a long way to go to get to a million miles. This summer it has been 2 years since I was in London. In some ways it seems like it was yesterday and in some ways it seems like it was a lifetime ago. But I am eager to travel out of the country again. I am in need of fresh sights and new experiences. I need a re-focused perspective of the world that for me can only be gained by exposure to a new and different country and culture. More

I love getting mail. It ranks right up there with cooking on my list of things I love most in the world. I'm not even kidding. If I'm having a bad day and I get mail it is suddenly a great day. There's just something about it. I think it's because someone cares enough about me to actually sit down and take some time to send me something in the mail. Granted not all mail is great...mail also carries junk mail, bills and other not as fun stuff. But getting a letter in the mail is like hitting a gold mine for me. I get almost giddy on the inside as I sit down with my letter opener and cut open the envelope. I have kept up a correspondence with my grandparents who live 1,500 miles away ever since I came to college. I'm not nearly as good at keeping up as I used to be, but something I've noticed over the course of these years is that it doesn't really matter what the letter says. Most of the time my grandma writes about the weather and what's happening on t

I love when I rediscover how much I love something. It's like seeing the world through completely new eyes once again. There is somehow a new freshness to life and there is new vitality in everyday things. It is the little moments where this happens that remind me of how much God loves me. It's like the veil is pulled back for a moment, and I get a tiny glimpse of heaven. My mentor calls these kisses from God. They are just wonderful moments where God shows you how much He loves you. I had a moment last night when I cooked dinner for my three good friends. I tried four new recipes last night...all of them were delicious and nutritious. My favorite was the dessert: mango and papaya with mango cream. A completely delightful treat and completely healthy at the same time. I love it when that happens. Somewhere in the middle of cooking I realized how much fun I was having. It was so much fun, and so wonderful to see my three good friends enjoy what I made. In that moment I was comp

A day in the life... go to bed at 1:30 am wake up at 7:30 am attempt to attach trailer using all of my strength to lift the trailer hitch get strong neighbor to help me drive 6.5 hours pulling trailer with wrecked mini on it spend 40 minutes attempting to unload car off of trailer get grandpa to help finally unload car grab a few items out of other wrecked mini return trailer cash check at the bank and inform them I will be out of the country get vehicle inspected at sheriff's office phone dies with phone charger 5 hours away attempt to register vehicle without success get paperwork to send to mi papi so he can register vehicle start 5 hour drive back stop to buy new phone charger attempt to connect wires under hood of vehicle to make phone charger work finally settle for not charging my phone drive home name new vehicle Penelope discover I had a reaction to something and am broken out in a rash get home charge phone realize that I missed a babysitting opportunity and that I'm

Naps pretty much rock my world...especially when I have little and un-restful sleep at that. Long days and short nights mean too much caffeine and not enough sleep. Makes me irritable and short-tempered. Not that that's an excuse for being ill-tempered. I hate not being a better person. Brings home the reality of "I am dark, but lovely." (Song of Solomon 1:5). Days like that I just want to disappear from all social life and not re-emerge until I am more pleasant to be around. Nap-time is an acceptable substitute for disappearing entirely. I need to retreat and let my soul be washed clean by Jesus again. I need to soak up His presence and His character. You become who you hang out with. I need to hang out with Jesus more. It's difficult when you are around people 18-20 hours a day and then sleep the other 4-6. Reading the Word in a less-than-quiet corner just isn't quite the same as having a shut door and privacy to cry and pray and repent and learn. God is still g

I read about Sloth this morning - sitting outside in the cooler, yet still super muggy morning, enjoying my orange juice and muffin. It was incredibly convicting and yet encouraging as well. Sloth is laziness in plain terms, but the chapter I read this morning made me realize that it is so much more than laziness. It is more of a desire to do what I want in life instead of doing the normal, everyday tasks that God has set out for me to do. What was really convicting to me is that I struggle a lot with boredom. I get tired of the same old thing all the time. And to a certain extent this is a good thing because it is good to keep freshness and energy in life, but I have to be careful about my motives. Spice and variety in life are good as long as they don't interfere with the routine tasks that I need to accomplish. God gave us routine for a reason. The sun rises and sets every day. The seasons come and go and come again. The entire world revolves in a pattern day after day, week aft

Finally got contacts again today...I had forgotten how much I love wearing dark sunglasses that cover half of my face. While I was waiting for my appointment at the eye doctor, I perused the clearance books at a store across the street. I found two books, one of which I read today. It was all about chocolate and friendship and how the two not only go together, but are also similar to each other. I'm eager to try some of the recipes that she includes in the book - including the recipes for good friendship. Basically it just made me crave chocolate and friend time. The next few days are going to be crazy days. Tomorrow I am speaking at a church about Potter's House before coming back to town to watch the World Cup Final (Vamos Espana!!!!) at the pub with K and K. Making an appearance at my church's picnic before heading out of town to meet mis padres and get my new wheels from them. Monday morning is going to be full of getting my registration and all of that straightened out

Compassion: n. Deep awareness of the suffering of another coupled with the wish to relieve it. Suffering surrounds us everyday. It has to because without suffering we wouldn't know what joy is, and we live in a fallen world. There is pain. There is suffering. Everyone has experienced it in some way, shape, or form. Sometimes we are unaware of it. Sometimes we choose not to see it. Sometimes we see it, but do nothing about it. Sometimes we have compassion. Matthew 9:36 says, "When He [Jesus] saw the crowds, He had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd." It takes great strength to look suffering in the eye and have compassion. It requires much of you. It is much easier to ignore it, pretend it doesn't exist. And I confess that is what I do much of the time. Why? Because I don't know what to do to relieve suffering. I don't know how to fix the great problems of the world. I don'

My roommate is out of town until tomorrow which makes the house super quiet and a little lonely. But I still have plenty to keep me busy. Saw the Spain and Germany game today at the pub with K. Despite my love of my German roots, today found me cheering for Espana. They haven't won the world cup yet, and they just earned it more than Germany did. So sorry Deutschland. Vamos Espana!!! I had a lovely quiet time outside this morning. It was an uncharacteristically cool morning for midway through July, so I was soaking it up, enjoying the cool morning before the blazing hot ones that are sure to come. Anyway, I was thinking about beauty (big surprise there...I have a bit of a fascination with beauty), and I realized that the most perfect and complete beauty comes from a manifestation of God in a person's life. There are two specific instances in Song of Solomon where the Bridegroom praises the beauty of the Bride. The first is in Chapter 4 and the second is in Chapter 6. The fir

I had my first real 4th of July celebration in 4 years yesterday. I didn't realize how long it had been until I was sitting by the lake enjoying the fireworks last night. Then I started figuring out in my head the last time I had seen a real fireworks display. Last year I was at a wedding, and we had fireworks that evening out at the bride's parents house. That day was ridiculously cold, though, and filled with all the wonderful wedding festivities. So it didn't really seem like the 4th. The year before I was in Scotland. And I remembered last night that I had lost my voice. That was an interesting 4th of July. But I felt better about celebrating in Scotland than England. You see the Scottish rebelled against the English at one point as well. The year before that I was living in Washington, D.C. with my sister, and we didn't go to the grand fireworks display because it was gross out. It had rained and then was ridiculously muggy. There were so many people and parking wa

I was walking and taking pictures by the lake earlier this afternoon. That's something I just love doing. I go at my own pace. I stop without warning. And I take my own sweet time. When I studied away in London my friend who I always traveled with finally got used to my way of walking and picture taking. She knew that as soon as I said the words: "That' such a pretty tree (lovely house, cool door, sweet car, etc.)" that I would be stopping to take a picture, so she automatically stopped. Anyway...walking makes it easier for me to think. It's something about the monotony of the steps and not having anything else pressing to do besides walk that frees up my mind to think about things I don't normally think about. Like remembering my friend from that trip. I started thinking about why I love taking pictures. I've been snapping away with a camera since I was little. My sister and I bought the same cameras in different colors from Alco when we were probably 7 o

I have been smiling and laughing for the last couple of days. That's what friends and sunshine and good times will do for you. And tomorrow is the 4th of July. Happy Birthday America!!! :) Yesterday, I made a somewhat stupid decision. Yes, I am prone to stupid decisions. But I did think about it first. I jumped off a 60 foot cliff into the lake while having no previous experience in "cliff jumping". This probably wasn't the wisest decision as I didn't really know what I was doing. I landed wrong, and I have the bruises to prove it. K said it looks like I lost a fight with a rhino. But for that split second (or rather a couple of seconds) while I was falling through the air, I felt wholly and completely ALIVE. I was completely abandoned to something over which I had no power. I think that's how our walk with God is supposed to be. Completely and totally abandoned. Okay, so maybe not quite the same thing. the view from the top of the cliff Part of me is really

I am mucho excited to be headed to the lake with my lovely friend this evening. Four days of blissful sunshine, lake, fireworks on the 4th, making new friends, enjoying old ones, and resting. A good friend is leaving the country today...for an entire year (or more). I'm so glad that he is going, and a little sad at the same time. But endings are just new beginnings, so I'm excited to see what is on the other side of this page. God is teaching me what it means to be still. It doesn't necessarily mean not thinking about things or not doing things (although that can be part of it). I think it means more having a heart that is quiet, content, and peaceful before Him. "Be Still and Know that I am God." - Psalm 46:10 This is the verse that started it all this morning. [H, I know you will appreciate that.] But it connected with a couple other verses that I have been reading. Resulting in a lovely long quiet time ending with a peaceful and quiet heart. a trip to the lake