Fluid Areas...

I am a very protective person especially when it comes to my girls. Therefore whenever someone hurts one of my girls, I immediately become defensive. I am trying to overcome this a little and see the other side of an issue, but there are sometimes when I really just want to sit some boys down and give them lectures about their behaviors.

My friend, K, wrote a song that has the following lyrics in it: "Are you even listening, listening to what you're saying to me? Do you even realize, realize what you're doing to me?" I have come to realize that for the most part men really don't know and really don't realize what they say has such a profound impact on us girls.

In the book Revelations of a Single Woman by Connally Gilliam, she writes such a wonderful analogy of what women go through. She relates a woman's heart to a garden (which if you read Song of Solomon is quite accurate). In this garden there is an inner sanctum which is at the very core of her heart and into which only her husband (and God) should be allowed. Then there are the public areas where everyone is allowed.

Then, however, there are the fluid in between areas, and this is where it gets messy and complicated. The only people who should be allowed in these areas are family, close friends, a few men who are like brothers, and men who are seriously interested in inner sanctum husbandry. Trouble happens when guys traipse about in the fluid areas, and girls allow them to do this.

My advice to men: initiate and define. Initiate EVERYTHING, please. And define. Please, even if you don't know where something is going, define. If you aren't interested, define. If you are interested, define. Please don't leave us guessing what is going on. And please, please respect the fluid areas.